Never, EVER pity a narcissist


Understanding that narcissists are driven by shame caused by abandonment doesn’t mean we should pity them.

Individuals with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) behave as they do as a result of the trauma of abandonment in childhood. But does that mean we should feel sorry for them and brush their shitty behavior aside because “they can’t help it?”

I say, “Absolutely not!” If anything, we should make them more accountable for their behavior and call them out immediately.

As a person who has suffered from the trauma of physical abuse and violence and intense emotional abuse, I hold no one to blame for my bad behavior or poor choices. It took me many, many years to come to terms with what happened to me at 18 at the hands of an abusive boyfriend and several months to deal with the emotional abuse I suffered at 38.

My early refusal to face…

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